Not content with their assault on our traditional roast beef, ales,sausages, maltreatment of Fenians and character-building cruelty to children, the wretched überbürgers of Brussels - under orders no doubt from their masters in Berlin - have now set about removing our most treasured classic vehicles from the highways and byways of fair Albion.
From April 2002, the supply of appropriately leaded, high-octane petroleum is to be thoughtlessly banned throughout the so-called "European Union", relegating the graet Hurley-Pugh marque motionless to museums, to be gazed upon in dumb awe by hordes of polyester-clad plebeians. And does Her Majesty's so-called Government do anything? Oh, no, the Pinko Scum bend their knee to Johnny Foreigner and even deprive us of the very handguns we might need to defend ourselves from the ever-present Hun threat.
What if a few mewling infants' brains are a little softer than they undoubtedly would be anyway? The amount of so-called pollution discharged from a H-P on full throaty, clanking jabber cannot be measured against the proud pleasures of the ride. Lead is a proper and wholesome ingredient of True-Blue British fuel. Those readers who remember low-octane wartime "pool" petrol will also recall the dire consequences - the impossible starting (many HP's did not turn a wheel from 1939 to 1945 without the aid of a brandy octane-booster) and the detonations - only barely made excusable by the needs of our brave young pilots. And now it seems our sacrifice was for naught, the lights are once again going out across Europe.
I urge you all to fight this assault upon our shores as no less a threat than "Operation Sealion" or the Legalisation of Sodomy. Write to your Member, to the newspapers, and wireless companies and to Herr "Adolf" Bangemann, reminding him of his obligations under the Troyes, Versailles and Potsdam Treaties. For the sake of our true heritage, "Arm! Arm and out!There is no flying hence nor tarrying here!"
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