The Board of the Grand Lodge of the H-PEC, in secret session, has met to consider the latest pernicious attempts by Aliens and Philistines closer to Home to subvert the Graet Marque and the Founders' Reputation.
A gimcrack manufactory located in the industrial anthills of the Orient recently produced a blatant plagiarism of the innovative Patent Pughrotor Rear Suspension Unit (without the corresponding Patent Pughstiff Handlebar-Mounted Steering Damper, thus rendering its machine unrideable). However, as no true-blue son of Albion's fair loins could ever be tempted by a machine assembled by chaps who live on pudding rice and fish taken raw, without the benefit of chipped potatoes, the Board intends to take no further action.
But Grand Lodge patience has been sorely tried by news that a British factory has now also violated the memory of Alaric Pugh - by fitting a copy of the 1938 Patent Pughrake Infinitely-Adjustable Headstock. (Cognoscenti will recall this as the definitive solution to occasional complaints that a motorcycle massing in excess of 57 stone with a wheelbase approaching three yards was not a quick steerer. Pughrake allowed the rider - simply by undoing a sturdy brass thumbscrew - to detach the headstock and forks, accomplish his change of angle and then re-attach. While requiring a degree of both physical strength and gymnastic aptitude, it worked perfectly under most circumstances and it was only the outbreak of the Unwanted War which led to its abandonment.)
The matter has come to a head (as it were), because the establishment in question, with a lack of attention to matters of detail so dismally prevalent in this modern age, also neglected to fit the system properly - principally because its headstock is impact-detached, and reattachment 'on-the-fly' problematic, involving mounted use of alloy welding equipment.
This situation could not be tolerated, and so a deputation from the Grand Lodge Patents Committee (Enforcement No 2) has demanded that the transgressor either fit the entire Patent assembly, including the thumbscrew, in such a way as to permit swift roadside reunification of the sundered components, or cease its infringement. It has chosen the latter option and is currently withdrawing this "bootleg" Pughrake surreptitiously, by recalling all machines thus fitted for frame replacement.
[previous article][next article]
[HPO&EC home][The Fettler]